Help please...a little bit cunfussled!?

To say the least me and the father of the baby arent together.....my choice...but for good reasoning. Long story short he started being really rude and immature...I gave him slack thinking he was scared....kept getting worse and worse and the comments were getting ruder. Something about staying with his ex girlfriend because she was better and did so much for him and I did nothing. Needless to say...had enough and left. I never thought he could get more immature untill he said he was going to fight for full custody becuase I left him. he doesnt care about the baby itself just more or less that it is a connection to me. Hes been a little phyco in the past (drive by check in's when we werent together,getting my passwords to email, facebook, voicemail to check those) calling me when i wasnt home because i was with guys and saying how bad i look being with another guy and not him)......i just dont know my right as a mother and what rights he has......I do not want him in the delivery room and I know as mucha s I dont have to have him there......he thinks if i find out the sex of the baby i HAVE to tell him but needless to say my mother wants it to be a super surprise for her and so do i and if he knows the whole world will know....i didnt want anyone to know i was pregnant and he told everyone without my permission. He thinks i HAVE to take him to ultrasound appointments and he HAS to be in the delivery room. He says hes going to go to lawyers( im not overly worried he makes empty threats all the time) Adnd truley he has the attitude like if i dont feel like giving the baby back to you i wont do it i will do it when im good and ready....hes dont it before with my stuff....and im scared one day he wont give the baby back.....i dont beleive hes mentally stable to be looking after a child....im only half way in my pregnancy so i know there isnt much he can do till the baby is born but i dont trust him with my baby.....ive grown it and taken care of it......all he does is cause stress. Dont really know what to do:S





So the day before we broke up he ';fixed'; the brakes on my car.....this was about a week into Feb...He said he was getting his father to fix them and I trust his father because his dad fixed my car before...he also told me I needed to pull out more money for a new caliper.....then we got in a huge fight broke up and he kept saying something like ';I hope your car brakes down again so you see how much I did for you'; or ';If you dont give me my money right now Im comming and taking those new brakes away(I F**K'N PAID FOR THEM!).so about a week ago my brakes really started grinding and it got me wondering I was like WTF is going on here?!?! They just got fixed! So my friend who had the car before me got her boyfriend to look at it ( He did all the work before I had the car) and when he pulled off the wheel looked at the brake...looked at me shook his head and said this is definitly not a new brake and this caliper...its so cracked that if it cracked anymore....your brake line would have gone and you wouldnt have been able to stop......i was like are you kidding me.....theres no way in a month i would have gone through a new brake.....he said it looked like he bent back the roter and greased it up enough that it would stop grinding the first time. For someone who ';cares'; so much about the baby he was sure willing to put mine and it's life in danger. He also put alot of pther peoples lives in danger. I kept reciepts from my brakes and i also kept the brakes and caliper. He hasnt tried to talk to me since my staus said i was getting my braked redone because they got f**ked up! Im so mad....hwo could someone be so selfish?





He obviously doesnt not care about this baby. Its so selfish to have put our lives in danger and I do not this he shoudl be allowed any right to this baby after doing such a thing.Help please...a little bit cunfussled!?
You could always get a lawyer and make sure that he doesnt get in you and your babies way. You to arent married anymore and its your choice if you want him in the delivery room or at the ultra sounds. You can also bring him to court over the brakes. And yes, that was very selffish of him and doing that to you was just mean. I wish you and your baby good luck! Congratulations and i hope everything goes well! %26lt;33Help please...a little bit cunfussled!?
Get a lawyer to protect YOU and the baby.
wow- that is a lot to swallow. First and formost, I am VERY proud of you- for many points through out your story. But I must say that I am praying for you to stay strong. We share somewhat similar stories..... but you and I both are most likely going to have to be strong willed women on this one... I say that your best bet is to just stay away from him- change your number.... find out what your rights are as a mother and stick to your guns sweetie...... good luck if you wanna talk- feel free to email me! CONGRATS and good luck!
get the cops on to him!!!!! you are not married therefore he has no parental rights.you can inform your doctor/midwife not to allow him near you or to give out information,hospital security will throw him out
Go to the police and get a restraining order. If possible, go and stay with family where he cannot find you. This man is displaying classic violent tendencies. Please stay safe for yourself and your baby.





Also, you will want to make sure everything that happens is documented by the authorities. This will assist in building a case to keep him away from your child after the birth. Best of luck with this, and remember, every action you take will be documented as well. Don't play into any games he tries. You main concern is your well being and the well being of your child.
I would definitely contact the authorities and make sure that the threats and ';brake thing'; are on record for the future.


Contact a lawyer to find out what exactly kind of rights the father has and what he's entitled to.


You are under no obligation to tell him the sex of the baby, especially if you tell him you don't know what it is.


Good luck and try to stay away from him to be safe.
What is the question?





If you don't want him at any of your appointments or in the delivery room, don't tell him anything. He is not going to know when you are going to be at the doctors.





It sounds like he is very immature. If you fear he will not return your baby when he takes it for a visit, don't let him. Don't put him on the birth certificate when the baby is born. He will have to go to court and get a paternity test to prove he is the father before the judge will allow him any parental rights. And from what you've written, it doesn't sound like he will go through the trouble.





You are better off without him. Don't let him ruin your life and be a bad influence around your child. Good luck
i am a labor and delivery nurse. you can check yourself into the hospital privately. meaning, the hospital will put a symbol or notice next to your name in their computer so when someone calls or wants to know if you are there, they are alerted to say no. if he did find out, he does NOT have the right to be in the delivery room, that is completely up to you. hospitals have security and they can kick him off campus or even call the police and they will take care of it. you are not required to involve him in any appointments. sorry for what you are going through. i would highly suggest a restraining order and order of protection for your unborn child. unfortunately he does have rights since it is his child once it is born. that you will need a lawyer for and i suggest getting one now.
Get a lawyer. Find out your rights and what you can do to get protection. Then drop him out of your life. Go on to your appointments without him. If he keeps harrassing you (driving by and stuff) then get a restraining order. Good luck...and congrats on the baby.
I agree with the first response But I will add you don't need to tell him anything, not the sex, u/s appts, or even when you go into labor. They listen to the mother and he cannot come in the delivery room if you say no. I think he has a pretty weak case not to mention he would have to prove you are an unfit mom. You can petition the court that it be supervised visitation but you will need proof on unstability.