Im 21 and ive been inactive for 3 years. I want to become a publisher again and eventually get baptized as i know this is he right thing to do and i love Jehovah. However ive been dating my boyfriend now for 3 years. He is against religion of any kind, he believes in God though just not religion. I am completely in love with him he is the nicest sweetest person and everyone loves him, that's the only thing that is wrong with him. Im questioning the fact that if i become a publisher he will stop me from further advancing. Advice please, i really don't want to brake up with him i love him dearly. He doesn't mind it when i go to the kingdom hall, i just don't know how hard it will be for us because he does not understand that it is a sin to fornicate and he wants to get married when he graduates from college and has a good job he has two more years to go. Please give me advice. JW ONLY please.To Jehovah's Witnesses only please i need your help?
I was in a similar situation. When I started studying I was engaged to my high school sweetheart. She was the love of my life. But after I started studying with Jehovah's Witnesses, about 3-4 months in, she told me that I needed to make a decision. I had to choose between her and Jehovah.
I choose Jehovah and never looked backed. Jehovah had blessed me over and over again over the years. I KNOW that I made the right choice. ALWAYS put Jehovah FIRST and you can't go wrong. (Matthew 6:33) “Keep on, then, seeking first the kingdom and his righteousness, and all these [other] things will be added to YOU.';
If you have the book ';Questions Young People Ask—Answers That Work, Volume 2';, look at chapter 3 entitled ';Is This Person Right for Me?'; and Chapter 35 ';How Can I Become God’s Friend?';
Also you can look in the book ';The Secret of Family Happiness'; 2006
Printing
Look at Chapter Two ';Preparing for a Successful Marriage';
Hope that this helped
EDIT --
If he is open to a Bible study, that would be great. I thought you said though that he was ';against religion of any kind'; that is why I made the comment the way I did.
Even with this, still be careful. It has happened before that someone studies just to make things go better for now, and then once you and or him dedicate your life to Jehovah, everything changes. So just make sure that if he does study, that he is taking it seriously. Of course you can't read hearts, so you have to do this to the best of your ability.
EDIT AGAIN---
I just read your update. I know that it hurts right now, but the hurt you feel now is NOTHING compared to the hurt you would of felt if he was like that after you got married.
I commend you for the stand you are taking for Jehovah and I am SURE that He has taken note of what you are doing for His name and your relationship with Him. You will look back at this moment years from now and get down on your knees and thank Jehovah that you made this choice to serve Him and stand up for what is right.
You have a world wide Brotherhood right behind you too, including your friends here on R%26amp;S. If you need anything, just ask. We are here for you.
You will be in my prayers Sister.
AgapeTo Jehovah's Witnesses only please i need your help?
You are facing the exact same issue Adam had to deal with when Eve ate the fruit.
Adam took sides with Eve and then blamed Jehovah. We all face tests like that, will we put friends, family and dear loved ones before doing things Jehovahs way?
This mixed relationship is already showing signs of 'opposition'.
Please beware.
EVEN IF he consents to marry you to make it scriptural and lets you persue your faith to some degree, I suggest you DO NOT do it!
I married out of the faith, though no fornication.....It has been 15 1'2 years of trouble and mistakes....
Trust in Jehovah only not in man.
Debbie
Is it mere coincidence that you have been dating him for 3 years and have been inactive 3 years too?
You already know what to do: decide whom you love the more, Jehovah or Boyfie.
=====
Yep Rachel, good.
Hi sweet heart I sent you an email I hope it will give you encouragement I can't imagine what you must be going through right now
I hope that --whatever happens-- you do as you have said!
I have put together a list of articles that you might consider sharing with him. (It was too long to post here, so 'MakeSure' posted the 'extras'.)
Regarding: ';he believes in God';, you might share the following:
Why Get to Know God? :
- Believing in a God We Might Not Know
- Jehovah---A God Worth Knowing
http://watchtower.org/e/20030215/article…
The Right Reason for Believing
- Accurate Knowledge---Key to Belief in God
http://watchtower.org/e/20031201/article…
Taking in Knowledge of God---How?
- In Search of the Truth
- Identifying God's Channel of Instruction
http://watchtower.org/e/20061015a/articl…
Regarding:
';[One of his arguments] is that the bible was written by imperfect men, things like that';, you might share with him:
The following articles really are great, but, I think he'd benefit much more by studying the brochure: ';A Book for All People';. One of the interesting things it discusses, is why *it made much more sense for God to have the Bible recorded by men*, than any spiritual entity.
That brochure isn't presently online, but these articles are:
The Bible: To Trust or Not to Trust
- A Unique Book
- Reasons to Trust the Bible
http://watchtower.org/e/200711/article_0…
Why You Can Trust the Bible :
- Does It Contradict Itself?
- History and Science
- Foretelling the Future
http://watchtower.org/e/t13/article_01.h…
The Gospels—History or Myth?
http://watchtower.org/e/20000515/article… ;
Was Luke in Error about the Birthplace of Jesus?
http://watchtower.org/e/19981215/diagram… ;
';Ancient Scribes and the Word of God';
- The Early Scribal Profession
- Scribes in Ancient Israel
- Integrity of the Scriptures
http://watchtower.org/e/20070315a/
Why You Can Trust Bible Prophecy
http://watchtower.org/e/19990715/article…
Reconciling Science and [True] Religion
http://watchtower.org/e/20020608/article…
One of the benefits of having so many articles --and, in such variety-- online, is the fact that in most of them, the Scripture references are e-links to the Bible verses named---So, the less interested might still be willing to read those Scriptures, since they are only a click away!
.
I have read your entire post and I have to say this, you do realize that this whole mess would have gone so much differently and better if you were with a man who really loved Jehovah?
I'm studying the Bible with the Witnesses and I can see more and more that what I'm doing is the right thing. Sweetie, God knows you have strong needs and he will satisfy them in his time and his way. Right now babe you gotta get your tail in gear. You have gotten some great advise from many witnesses here.
I get as horny as the trumpet section in a orchestra at times and I know I can easily go out there and find a so called decent man in this world EASILY. I don't want that though, I deserve better and so do you.
Look at the responses from the witnesses here, it's so obvious that they have it. Read what Myro said, he's freakin awesome! I have emailed him and his wife many times, sometimes what he says is hard to swallow but it's all from the Bible. He doesn't like me talking about him like this, so I'm gonna email you (look for my email). I am also gonna alert this guy Reo, he is studying like me and he has gone through some things, I'm sure that he will be encouraging for you.
Don't be a fool. Let your ex-boyfriend go, if you love him the way you say you do you should let him go. Your being with him won't help him or you babe. Cry if you must, I know how you feel, trust me I do, but it's gonna be okay, it's better this way.
Ciao
** NOTE'; My use of ';ALL CAPS'; is not to be taken as ';shouting';, it is simply my way of emphasizing certain keywords, phrases and or statements of importance. Thank you in advance. **
You stated and I quote:
';He is against religion of any kind, he believes in God though just not religion. I am completely in love with him he is the nicest sweetest person and everyone loves him, that's the only thing that is wrong with him.';
Beloved one, allow the Scriptures to break this down for you.
#1) YOU stated:
';He is AGAINST religion of ANY kind.';
(';ALL CAPS'; mine)
Jehovah's Word the holy Bible says:
';Hebrews 10:24, 25: “Let us consider one another to incite to love and fine works, not forsaking the gathering of ourselves together, as some have the custom, but encouraging one another, and all the more so as you behold the day drawing near.”
#2) YOU stated:
';he believes in GOD though just not religion';
(';ALL CAPS'; mine)
Jehovah's Word the holy Bible says:
';among whom the GOD OF THIS SYSTEM OF THINGS [Satan the Devil] has blinded the minds of the unbelievers, that the illumination of the glorious good news about the Christ, who is the image of God, might not shine through.';
- 2 Corinthians 4:4
';Know that JEHOVAH is God';
- Psalms 100:3a
#3) YOU stated:
';I am COMPLETELY in love with him';
(';ALL CAPS'; mine)
Jehovah's Word the holy Bible says:
';He [Jesus Christ] said to him: “‘You must LOVE JEHOVAH YOUR GOD with your WHOLE HEART and with your WHOLE SOUL and with your WHOLE MIND.’ 38 This is THE GREATEST and first commandment.';
- Matthew 22:37, 38
#4) YOU stated:
';he is the NICEST SWEETEST person and EVERYONE loves him';
(';ALL CAPS'; mine)
Jehovah's Word the holy Bible says:
';and the young man [She′chem] did not delay to perform the condition, because he did find delight in Jacob’s daughter [Dinah] and he was THE MOST HONORABLE of the whole house of his father.';
- Genesis 34:19
#5) YOU stated:
';that's THE ONLY THING that is wrong with him';
(';ALL CAPS'; mine)
Jehovah's Word the holy Bible says:
';What! Do YOU not know that the body of YOU people is [the] temple of the holy spirit within YOU, which YOU have from God? Also, YOU DO NOT BELONG TO YOURSELVES, 20 for YOU were bought WITH A PRICE. By all means, glorify God IN THE BODY OF YOU PEOPLE.';
- 1 Corinthians 6:19, 20
';You ARE NOT to conclude a covenant with THEM or THEIR GODS. 33 They should not dwell in your land, that they may not cause you to sin against me. In case you should serve their gods, it would become a snare to you.”
- Exodus 23:32, 33
';And you MUST FORM NO MARRIAGE ALLIANCE WITH THEM. Your daughter you MUST NOT give to his son, and his daughter you MUST NOT take for your son. 4 For he WILL turn your son from following me, and they WILL certainly serve other gods [do you think you were serving Jehovah for the past 3 years?]; and Jehovah’s anger WILL indeed blaze against YOU, and he WILL certainly annihilate you in a hurry.';
- Deuteronomy 7:3, 4
';DO NOT become unevenly yoked with UNBELIEVERS. For what FELLOWSHIP do RIGHTEOUSNESS and LAWLESSNESS have? Or what sharing does LIGHT have with DARKNESS? 15 Further, what harmony is there between CHRIST and BE′LI·AL? Or what portion does a FAITHFUL PERSON have with an UNBELIEVER? 16 And what agreement does GOD'S TEMPLE have with IDOLS? For we are a temple of a living God; just as God said: “I shall reside among them and walk among [them], and I shall be their God, and they will be MY people.” 17 “‘Therefore GET OUT from among them, and SERPARATE yourselves,’ SAYS JEHOVAH, ‘and quit touching the unclean thing’”; “‘and I will take YOU in.’” 18 “‘And I SHALL BE a father to YOU, and YOU will be sons and DAUGHTERS to me,’ SAYS JEHOVAH THE ALMIGHTY.” ';
- 2 Corinthians 6:14 - 18
Jehovah's Law is absolutely CRYSTAL clear regarding your alliance with your boyfriend based on the things in which you yourself have stated in light of God's Word.
You ALREADY know what you need to do. Those who don't know God may tell you otherwise or to simply just ';follow your heart'; (Jeremiah 17:9, 10) but Jehovah says otherwise.
If you wish to have your ears tickled so that you can hear what your ';heart'; wants you to hear... those who don't know Jehovah is the way to go.
If however, you are seeking THE TRUTH, God's view as to your situation and what you should do, then your situation becomes a matter of LOYALTY to Jehovah.
Either you LOVE Jehovah in the manner in which He states we are to show and prove our love for Him as it is written:
';For this is what the love of God MEANS, that we OBSERVE HIS COMMANDMENTS; and yet his commandments ARE NOT burdensome [not for the person who TRULY loves Him]';
- 1 John 5:3
OR... you love your boyfriend over Jehovah. Don't fool yourself into somehow thinking that YOU can change him (MANY people have tried and indeed keep trying to ';ice-skate'; uphill... simply to come to the exact same conclusion).
You will find this one thing out for yourself, the CLOSER you get to Jehovah the more strained the relationship you currently are maintaining shall become.
I feel for you, however, as a messenger of Jehovah God, I shall not water down His message to you. You have a choice to make, and that choice is no diferent than the choice Jehovah put to the Israelites through Moses where it is written:
';See, I do put before you today life and good, and death and bad. 16 [If you will listen to the commandments of Jehovah your God,] which I am commanding you today, so as to love Jehovah your God, to walk in his ways and to keep his commandments and his statutes and his judicial decisions, then you will be bound to keep alive and to multiply, and Jehovah your God must bless you in the land to which you are going to take possession of it.
17 “But if your heart turns away and you do not listen, and you are actually seduced and bow down to other gods and serve them, 18 I do tell YOU today that YOU will positively perish. YOU will not lengthen YOUR days on the ground to which you are crossing the Jordan to go to take possession of it. 19 I do take the heavens and the earth as witnesses against YOU today, that I have put life and death before you, the blessing and the malediction; and you must choose life in order that you may keep alive, you and your offspring, 20 by loving Jehovah your God, by listening to his voice and by sticking to him; for he is your life and the length of your days, that you may dwell upon the ground that Jehovah swore to your forefathers Abraham, Isaac and Jacob to give to them.”
- Deuteronomy 30:15 - 20
';This is what Jehovah has said, your Repurchaser, the Holy One of Israel: “I, Jehovah, AM YOUR GOD, the One teaching you to benefit [yourself], the One causing you to tread in the way IN WHICH YOU SHOULD WALK. 18 O IF ONLY you would actually pay attention to my commandments! Then your peace would become just like a river, and your righteousness like the waves of the sea [never-ending].';
- Isaiah 48:17, 18
http://www.watchtower.org/e/19990215/art…
(What Is Needed for a SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE?)
*******
EDIT
*******
I was thinking that you were ALREADY dedicated and baptized, however, I have read your statement question again and I see that you are not. Nonetheless, the principals and Laws of Jehovah still apply.
You stated:
';Because right now I AM NOT WILLING to give up on the relationship just yet. I am always going to put Jehovah FIRST no matter what.';
By that statement alone, you show that it is NOT Jehovah who is in 1st place position of your life currently, most truthfully, He is in 2nd or 3rd place position.
Continue your studies, however the focal point should NOT be on your boyfriend, the focal point should be on you and your relationship with the Father. If your boyfriend is truly one of Jehovah's sheep through His Christ, there is absolutely NOTHING and or NO ONE who could prevent him from coming into the truth of Christ's pen.
However, this is not through your own power and or ability, it is by Jehovah through Christ. If he is to learn about our God, a very powerful force will be the example of genuine Christian conduct on the part of they who are conducting him through study and in association with him.
Listen, if he and you are ';meant to be'; it will happen... but by Jehovah through Christ. If he does accept a Bible study, he WILL NEED a considerable amount of time to bring his thinking, habits, ways... HIS LIFE, into harmony with the will of Jehovah as outlined in the Scriptures.
Your sincere desire for wanting him to accept the truth, could in and of itself, become a stumbling block to him.
I am only a messenger (John 7:16-18).
BlahNii hit it right on the money. This is precisely what Adam went through. He was very much in love with his beautiful wife. Of course he was! She was literally made for him. He was supposed to be madly in love with her. But Satan knew that too and used Eve against Adam. Eve, of course, allowed herself to be used in this despicable way. But Adam deliberately chose his wife over his God. He loved Jehovah God very much but he loved his wife more. It may sound romantic (baby, I love you more than anything and anyone) but the cold reality is that loving anything and anyone more than Jehovah is, in the final analysis, death. Adam did not even give Jehovah a chance to remedy the situation.
Give Jehovah a chance to remedy the situation. There was a woman - an actress - years ago who was very much in love with a man but was studying and about to become a baptized publisher. She was torn between this man and the God about whom she was learning. She chose Jehovah and in her own words, the intense love in her heart for this man faded away within a matter of days. Now love is not a light switch, we cannot turn it off and on. But it would seem that Jehovah can. She served Him until the day she died.
I am sorry your heart is broken. But it will heal. I promise you. Philippians 4:13: ';For all things I have the strength by virtue of him who imparts power to me.';
Hannah J Paul
I know that you are facing choices and you have to decide which one you love most, Jehovah God or your boyfriend. By the response of your boyfriend, it is time to determine who LOVES you the most.
He seems to be saying ';unless you keep providing yourself to me, you are ';selfish';';.
Yet you know Jehovah's response.
The others here that have been to the convention will tell the Drama this year about the Father welcoming his son back reached all of our hearts. Jehovah keeps opening up to so many the way back and it is a welcoming group back at the Hall.
One of the young men on Y!A has also working to overcome the same situation, so as to be able to return to Jehovah's service and his Family. So you are not alone, and you have a cheering section, as you could see by the many answers you got.
“No one can slave for two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will stick to the one and despise the other. You cannot slave for God and for [your heart's *un*theocratic desire].'; --Matthew 6:24; Luke 16:13
';. . . 'You must love Jehovah your God with your *whole* heart, soul, strength and mind,’ and, ‘your neighbor as yourself.’” --Luke 10:27
How can you show love for Jehovah, while ignoring his wise %26amp; loving advice?
You do seem to realize that the best thing for you to do, is to go ahead %26amp; come back to Jehovah, with a *whole* heart this time.
So, what is the best way to witness to your current boyfriend?
Is it by going against God's wise advice?
Or, by actually following it, %26amp; perhaps him becoming interested enough to look further into the matter, %26amp; *maybe* change his attitude?
Please read this set of articles, %26amp; look up *all* of the Scriptures therein . . . They were 'written just for you'! :
What Has Happened to Love? :
- The desire to be loved
%26gt; Why True Love Is Hard to Find %26lt;especially consider this one!
- How You Can Find True Love
http://watchtower.org/e/200603/article_0…
EDITED IN LATER:
AND, this one is especially (but, not only) for him:
What's Wrong With Premarital Sex?
- What Fornication Includes
- Serious Threats
- Learning Self-Control
http://watchtower.org/e/20040722a/articl…
PLUS, you might share these with him:
Regarding:
He is against religion of any kind, he believes in God though . . . His main argument is that religion is just something made up by men to control men';
Religion--What Good Does It Do?
- Why Many Have Turned From Religion
- Religion Used for Evil Ends
- “What Do I Care?”
http://watchtower.org/e/20060901/article…
Does It Matter Which Religion You Choose?
- How Do Religions Get Started?
- Whom Do Religions Want to Please?
http://watchtower.org/e/20070301/article…
';Can I Worship God in My Own Way?'; :
- A Need All of Us Share
- Why Are People Leaving Traditional Religions?
- Is ';Private Religion'; the Answer?
http://watchtower.org/e/20020422/article…
What Does the Future Hold for Christianity?
- A Sneak Attack on Christianity
- Christianity Subverted
- True Christians Shining in the Darkness
http://watchtower.org/e/200702/article_0…
Should You Believe Everything You Hear? :
- Propaganda Can Be Deadly
- The Manipulation of Information
- Do Not Be a Victim of Propaganda!
- Is the Work of Jehovah's Witnesses Propagandistic? http://watchtower.org/e/20000622/article…
The Bible---Just a Good Book? :
- Cherished and Suppressed
http://watchtower.org/e/20001201/article… ;
- The Struggle for a Bible in Modern Greek
http://watchtower.org/e/20021115/article… ;
- The Story of the Makarios Bible--A Previously Hidden Treasure
http://watchtower.org/e/19971215/article…
(These 3 share examples of how manmade religion has tried to keep God's Word out of the hands of the common people. Would it have attracted so much negative attention if it had been what he thinks?)
I speak from personal experience, I have been married to an unbeliever for 12 years, I was raised in the truth and have been disfellowshipped and returned 3 times always behind a relationship with a worldly man. While I would hope that my husband will have a change of heart, the reality is he most likely will not. As a result none of my children serve Jehovah now. I only wish I had taken heed to the counsel given to all of us regarding marriage. Below is a poem written by an unknown sister, please give it serious thought.
HE DOESN'T SERVE GOD
I'd like to tell you a story, about true love at last.
It's very informative and has an interesting cast.
So pay close attention, it's sad but true,
And don't ever think this can't happen to you.
I met him during lunch break on a sunny day,
He sat next to me and smiled, as I was about to pray.
We talked on and on. He was such a gentleman.
I wished that this moment would never end.
Ah, but then it came to be the end of my lunch hour.
I tell you when he stood up, he looked just like a tower!
We met again and again. Our souls began to cling.
I pondered in my mind, ';Is this the REAL thing?';
He doesn't smoke or drink, or gamble away his money.
He doesn't do drugs or things like that and he's nobody's ';honey';.
Let's face it, he's fine and he's really got a great ';bod';.
The only thing that's missing is he doesn't serve God.
I'll just give him a chance, he'll change in time.
I won't mind being ';his';, if he'd like to be ';mine';.
My friends tried to warn me. I didn't listen or care.
Little did I know my life would be one of despair.
The wedding was fine. The judge married us in the fall.
You see, I couldn't have a wedding in a Kingdom Hall.
My dad, no, he didn't give me away.
With the pain in his heart, he didn't have much to say.
Mom, listen to me, please don't cry and whine.
Don't worry about us, we'll be just fine.
I've got a good man and he has a good job.
The only thing is, he doesn't serve God.
Everything is going fine, but recently at night.
When it's time for the meeting, we just fuss and fight.
He says, ';Who's this God, breaking us apart?
Don't go tonight dear, please follow your heart.';
So I listen and stay, to keep peace at home.
But now oftentimes, I feel so all-alone.
I don't associate with the friends much at all,
To keep peace at home, I don't go to the Hall.
Service and Meetings, all that's history.
Today, I decorated my first Holiday Tree.
The holiday celebrations are now part of my life.
You see, I must obey my husband, for I am his wife.
The brothers would call. I wouldn't answer the door.
I don't read the magazines. Reading is such a bore.
Marrying out of the Truth, it really sets you ';free';.
';Free'; from Jehovah's love that once was in me.
I just got the news! I'm having a ';little one';!
I can hardly wait to tell my dear ';Hon';.
He was in a bad mood. He lost his job that day.
He told me as he hit me, ';That's just one more bill to pay!';
Then he apologized, ';I'm sorry, please forgive me Dear.';
You see, I've heard those words more often than I'd like to hear.
I have two jobs now. I must support my household.
My husband says he'll find work, but now that's getting old.
I'm tired. I'm stressed. I'm feeling very strange.
My schedule at both jobs, I'll have to rearrange.
I should be very happy, the baby is due any day.
Things just have to get better, somehow, some way.
I'm married to this man, for better or for worse.
The only problem is, he doesn't put Jehovah first.
The baby came today, she's so little and so light.
She's not crying or making noise, something's just not right.
';What could be wrong?'; I thought aloud as I lay in bed.
In came the doctor looking sad, and then he shook his head.
';Mrs. Unbeliever,'; he said, ';there's something I must confess.';
You and the baby tested positive to the new HIV test.
I started crying. I couldn't believe the words the doctor said.
To know that in a very short time, my child and I'd be dead!
Listen to me! All of you! I'm telling you to your face!
To marry an Unbeliever, is a TOTAL DISGRACE,
To Jehovah, our loving father, who provides for his sheep.
That's why he sets the guidelines for us to hold and keep.
Wait on Jehovah. In his due time He'll set things straight.
Be patient, and He'll give you a Theocratic mate.
One who loves Jehovah and you know that he'll do right.
One who'll be there with you when it comes to ';Meeting'; night.
A worldly man has nothing to offer - really nothing at all,
But unhappiness, sadness, sorrow, and a very serious fall.
So be wise my Sisters, and brothers too please don't try to rush things.
Wait patiently on Jehovah, and accept the blessings he brings.
Don't look to worldly men as mates, at your job or at the Mall.
REMEMBER! Brothers that serve Jehovah are at the Kingdom Hall Author Unknown
Now consider what you have to look forward to:
'One day of the Real Life'
Nowadays I like getting up with the sun and starting my day while it’s fresh and new. No more hitting that snooze button until the very last minute and dreading the workday ahead of me! I feel better and better every day, and I can’t help but notice I look better too. I have several jobs, and today I am privileged to be doing my very favorite task! Besides studying with newly resurrected ones, I have been granted the privilege of using my home as a sort of New System Bed and Breakfast. While the Resurrection Center was being constructed, I had a house full, 2 couples and two single sisters who lived here with me temporarily. Now that that work is over, families who live too far away from the Resurrection Center come and stay with me, sometimes just a few nights, often a week while their newly resurrected loved ones acclimate to this wonderful new world. This house has seen so much joy!
I have company arriving today – two fleshly brothers whose parents died in a car accident and are going to be resurrected in the same week. I want to make something special for tonight, so I head out to the raspberry patch to gather some to add to the apple pie I’m planning for dessert. The fox family that lives among the raspberry bushes comes out to greet me, the mother elegantly gliding toward me to have her chin scratched, and three cubs tumbling over each other in their play. My chickens aren’t a bit alarmed at all these foxes nearby, they go on searching for worms and scratching around the yard, clucking contentedly to one another.I’m nearly finished gathering berries when I notice two people coming along the path at the top of the hill. My Mother and her sister JoeAnn often come over for a cup of tea early in the morning; their home is only a 15 minute walk away through a beautiful wildflower garden, around the little pond, then through the forest and down the grassy hill to my house. The two of them are halfway here when a tall blond boy emerges from the woods, running as fast as his long legs will carry him to catch up to them. Their conversation stops as they turn at the sound, the youth skids to a stop to talk to them. Whatever Mom tells him, I can see it’s what he was hoping for, because he hugs her so hard he picks her up, and then leaving the path he runs towards the barn. My favorite Icelandic mare has a two week old foal, so I know where my brother is heading!
He notices me as he runs, he waves but doesn’t slow down – I’m glad, even after all these years I still get tears in my eyes sometimes at the sight of him. Dougie had died in the old world when he was only a baby, and the day he was resurrected was one of the happiest of all of our lives. My dear Mom had kept so much of the pain of losing him to herself, but when they placed her baby boy in her arms, she cried tears of joy for days afterwards. She and JoeAnn have really enjoyed raising him, from a chubby blond baby to an enthusiastic teenager now as tall as me, and sure to grow taller.I’m glad Dougie – no, he wants to be called Doug now, he thinks it sounds so much more grown up – went to the barn, I know he’ll put out fresh food and water for the animals, so I’ll have plenty of time to give him another lesson driving the curricle. What a joy it’s been to watch him grow up in this new world, with no more worries of sickness or any other harm coming to him.
I go into the house to put the tea kettle on to boil, and soon Mom and JoeAnn come in, full of happiness and good health. They both look radiant from their walk, and so beautiful. No more gray hair – in fact, Mom’s hair is thicker and more beautiful than in her youth. Their wrinkles have faded away from their faces; they seem to look younger every time I see them. Mom has a package with her, as she unwraps it she tells me it came yesterday from the message service with a long letter from my daughter Bethany. She and her husband are in the reconstruction work, but somehow she managed to find the time to paint a portrait of her newest granddaughter, Elizabeth. The picture is beautifully done, a sleeping chubby infant perhaps a few weeks old. Bethany always had artistic talent, but in the new world now, growing towards perfection, she has really surpassed herself. Busy with construction projects, Bethany isn’t spending a lot of time working on art – she knows she has forever to develop her talent! This painting she did especially for her grandmother and it warms my heart to see how happy Mom is.
While I make the pie crust and cut up the apples, we exchange news of friends and family, many of t
You still seem confused with what you really want!
You said, ';because right now i am not willing to give up on the relationship just yet. I am always going to put Jehovah first no matter what';. Yet your still with your boyfriend! That's not putting Jehovah first.
Did not Satan convince Eve that it was the right thing from eating from the tree? That desirable thing that Satan put in front of her cost her, her life!
We are commanded to only marry in the lord, its a command. There are so many brothers and sisters that marry out of the lord, some have even said, ';there is no one in the truth for me';. That's like saying to Jehovah no -one in your organization is good enough for me. I am not saying you said that, but the reality is, putting Jehovah first will give you rich blessings.
Matthew 6:33, “Keep on, then, seeking first the kingdom and his righteousness, and all these [other] things will be added to YOU.
Lets say, that your boyfriend does not except the truth, you get married and Armageddon comes! How will you feel, knowing that he may not get through in to the new system? When the great tribulation comes, will your husband be strong enough to help you get through it. It isn't called ';The Great Tribulation'; for nothing.
When the tribulation comes, if your boyfriend/husband is not in the truth, you ';may'; start to resent been in the truth knowing what is shortly going to take place, that could in return cost you your life. That would be such a shame when you have got so far.
Your brothers and sisters are here to help you, so are those from your old cong. Why not make a stand for the truth and contact an elder and start on the narrow path to everlasting life, that is just on the ';horizon';.
Whatever you decide, if you came back in the truth, you will be blessed from Jehovah. Remember that Jehovah never lets go of us, it's us who let go of him! Draw close to Jehovah, and he will draw close to you.
Brotherly Love
Darran
You want a happy, mature, meaningful marriage.
Your children will deserve happy, mature, meaningful parents.
To provide that in a way that Jehovah meant, it takes two happy, mature, meaningful servants of Jehovah to do that.
One Witness can work extra hard and pick up some of the slack for the marriage, and for the children.
But it is never the same than if both were strong servants of Jehovah.
Don't settle for less due to a bad decision.
Jesus said his sheep would hear his voice and LISTEN. If he is truly sheep-like, he will respond in time.
Step back and let him make his true intentions known.
He may have said what he said out of anger and hurt. BUT he may have said what he said because that is what is really deep down in his heart.
A little time will make it clear which it is. In the meantime, go to meetings, pray, and read the Bible. Talk to mature ones in the congregation. Let their enthusiasm about the truth encourage you and make you strong.
I was about 23 when I began studying. I was very popular and had many girlfriends. All my friends believed that I would never become a witness because I could never follow the bibles teachings. The more I studied the more I realized that Jehovah was real and this was the truth. I gave up all my friends. I was never so lonely in my life. But, I stuck to Jehovah and prayed that he would help me to find good association. I ended up meeting some brothers my age. I soon found out that they were true friends. One who became my best friend, I ended up marrying his sister. As I look back in my past and see my old friends now, I can honestly say Jehovah has blessed me. My old friends became serious alcoholics, drug users, married and divorced. My best friend spent about 10 years in jail. If I gave in when I first started studying, I know I would probably be dead right now. Many of my friends are. Im 47, and have such a faith full wife and 3 great kids.
Let Jehovah help you, like he helped me. If your boyfriend truly loves you, he would do anything not to loose you.That includes marrying you if your conscience bothers you from having premarital sex. I'm glad you are studying again and I hope to meet you in the new system.
Don't let anyone get in your way of serving Jehovah. If I listened to my friends I couldn't even imagine where I would be right now....Feel free to email me anytime...please make the right choice...Mark
You should talk with him about it before you make your decision. Tell him your desires and need to serve Jehovah. If he doesn't understand and wont let you do what is right, then the decision of whether to stay with him or not would be a lot more clear.
You need to be honest with him. He needs to know how much you love Jehovah and that He will always come first, if that's your wish to be active again. If he can not stop having sex with you then being with him wouldn't be wise, would it? You'd have that temptation ALWAYS. Now I'm not going to say worldy men don't take relationships serious or don't know how to love. Because that is a false statement.
I am married to an unbeliever and he is a wonderful man. I love him dearly and he loves me. He doesn't oppose at all to my meetings or service or association with the brothers. Our marriage works, and that's because we have COMMUNICATION. That's what you need. You need to be honest and straight with him. If you cant come to an agreement or if you see that it will be very difficult, then you should know its not a good idea.
Like others said, what's more important? Everlasting life, living the life that Jehovah intended for us? Or living THIS life, enjoying just a few more years.... it would seem the choice would be obvious.
I recommend you start praying to Jehovah and letting him know of all your worries and desires, CONSTANTLY. If you haven't done so already. Also getting help from your local Kingdom Hall.
Well Jesus said that the most important commandment that we can do is love Jehovah with all our heart, mind and soul THEN love our neighbours etc. So ultimately, we love Jehovah first and foremost. Because he deserves our love and honour, for the wonderful hope he's given us. Remember, you know about the truth of what the Bible teaches, please think hard about your choice because we cannot slave for two masters.
I know it's hard for some people to think why we should love Jehovah God first, and not our family, but Jehovah is our perfect father and he gave his kind and wonderful sons life for our lives.
What do you want? Everlasting life or death? The Bible clearly states that the Kingdom of God won't belong to fornicators etc.
I know it's hard but me and my boyfriend got married when we seriously started learning about the truth, but I do feel sad for you that your boyfriend doesn't fully accept the truth. Besides, you'll find an AWESOME husband in the new system!
Put your anxieties onto Jehovah and talk specfically with Him about this. Don't let someone stop or hinder you from making the BEST relationship you can ever have (with God Almighty:D)
But ultimately it's your choice, I would speak to an elder or just a nice sister and she can upbuild you with the Bible and her experience.
Even so, we don't have to marry within the truth, although, for obvious reasons it's best to :D My mother in law is married to a none believer but doesn't stop her from loving Jehovah and exercising her faith in Him and His Son, Jesus.
I really wish the best for you and your boyfriend.
Please take into consideration what the wonderful brothers and sisters say to you coz we love you and want you to be there in the Paradise!
What is more important to you....God and everlasting life or a few more years here with your boyfriend and eternal death?
Being with a non believer in a marriage is like having a dead maggot ridden corpse strapped to your front. He will celebrate holidays...tire of you going to meetings and service...he will have worldly friends he will expect you to associate with... and your witness friends will not invite you to many gatherings.
You may get to the point where you won't share conversation with him because you have nothing in common.
How will you raise your children? His mom will have something to say about that....She will expect her son at all worldly gatherings.
He will not have Jehovah's qualities to keep him faithful to you. To worldly guys marriage is a revolving door.
The reason I am so strong with you is that I divorced my first husband due to abuse...met a guy , real nice guy on line...and he said he would give the truth a try too...so we married...and he did go to the hall and study...for years...thought I was set...then he started dating other women....Do Not Marry A Worldly Man...I can't make it any plainer than that !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!…
It's really about what's more important to you, serving Jehovah or your boyfriend. When it comes to Jehovah, how much faith do you have in his ability to provide what you need to be happy? How long would it be before your boyfriend starts to have issues with your faith? You can't progress with the status of your relationship remaining the way it is. In order to have Jehovah's approval we have to be spiritually, physically and MORALLY clean. So although we can provide you with the help, ultimately the decision is yours and it definetly is a difficult one. I can promise you one thing...you'll never regret the decision to serve Jehovah because he will never let you down, will always keep his word and always do the things that are strictly in your best interest.
Addl: I feel your pain but I assure you, it will be worth it! Jehovah promised that he will wipe the tears from our eyes in the new system but he does so now as well. Please remember Proverbs 3:5 and lean on him to heal your hurt. Remember, too, what Jeremiah 17:9 says about the heart and make your decisions based on knowledge, that way you'll know that you have made a choice that will only benefit you now and forever.
Boy! Have I been where you now are! When I was 16, I started studying with Jehovah's Witnesses. I had a worldly boyfriend at the time who lived out of state. We wrote to each other every day and talked on the phone. I began telling him some of the things I was learning but he really didn't have much to say about it. He was periodically attending a church in his state but he wasn't religious. Then, when I made the decision I wanted to get baptized, I wrote and told him the happy news. His response? A post card which read in part, ';You are nothing but a damn Jehovah Witness! God can't give you a baby, but I can.'; I couldn't believe what I read! This came spewing out of the guy I thought really cared about me. He, in his own warped mind, must have thought I was joining some kind of religious order or something, like becoming a nun? Go figure. My response? I wrote him back and told him that if God wanted to give me a baby he would. He gave the Virgin Mary one. He asked that I mail him back everything he ever gave me; all my gifts. Although I was shocked by this, at the same time I was happy because I knew that this guy was proving what he really was and that saved me tons of future problems. I was baptized the following year at age 17. 40 years later, I am still serving Jehovah. A word to the wise, however. Don't think that just any Jehovah's Witness will do when it comes time to finding a mate who serves Jehovah. Being a baptized Witness is very important, but so is compatibility, good communication, similiar outside interests, similiar goals, maturity, etc. Bottom line? When it comes time to find a mate in Jehovah's organization, make sure that he loves Jehovah more than you; cause if he does, he will never do anything purposely to hurt you in any way, because of his love for Jehovah. ';At first there's pain and then the gain.'; Gaining life forever in Jehovah's New Earth.
strange, i'm not saying this to make you feel bad or anything but i noticed that you have been inactive for 3 years and you have been dating the same guy for 3 years.so is it that as soon as you got inactive you picked up this guy or before? if he is against religion of any kind then he will be against yours. non J.W.s who are the most nicest people at times are nasty towards J.W.s so imagine him who is against religion. if he doesn't understand that it is a sin to fornicate then you will be pressured to commit the act. which would lead to you being d/f. so girlie, i'll be pretty frank with you: the relationship is not going to work, he will make you have sex with him which will you get d/f. after he gets what he wants from you he will leave at the side there and get some other girl. so you may love him with all your heart, but he doesn't really love you with all his heart.
vot i'm learning the lessons :P
Well I understand your concern and I hope you make the right decision, but you have to be realistic and keep things in perspective. Most people have the desire to have a mate or companion, but as with all things there are obligations. As a Jehovah's Witness your very first obligation is to Jehovah God. (Deuteronomy 11:1)
If we were to rewind 3 years back, that would make you 18 years old. Dating as you know is for Marriage. 18 IS a 'legal age' to get married, and even though there are 'some' exceptions to the rule (a VERY few) , your average 18 year old does not even know who THEY are, let alone are in position to get Married which requires a person to be emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually mature.
So not to be blunt, but it seems that the situation you are in now is a direct result of a previous bad decision. So your problem is not 'now', it simple the 'result' of a seemingly unwise decision in your past. (1 Cor. 7:39)
Again, I am not saying this to be blunt, but because I do care, and it needs to be said. If he 'is against religion of any kind', your love is not founded on something 'realistic'. This does not mean that your 'love' is fake, or 'not real', I'm sure it is, especially if you have been dating for 3 years. But, what I am saying is that your 'love' has now blinded you from seeing things correctly. And that is not a 'well founded love', it is a 'dangerous love'. For example, there are people who are so SINCERE about what they believe, that they are willing to strap a bomb on their body, kill themselves and others. Is it sincere?? You betcha! But is it a 'well founded' belief??, obviously not!
The 'only thing that is wrong with him' as you state, is a BIG one. Spirituality is the MOST important thing, ESPECIALLY as a Man, being the 'Spiritual' head. You may love him and he may love you back, but he WILL keep you from progressing, because he already has.
Imagine where you could have been Spiritually speaking, now? Furthermore, if you marry him he will be your head.
Think about that seriously - Do you really want your 'head' to be a person that is 'against religion of every kind'?? If you have children (purposely or not) How will they be raised?? Do you think he is likely to let his children be raised in a 'religion' since he doesn't care for religion at all?? You HAVE to be realistic, and think about your future. There are people who DO marry in the truth, and STILL have major problems due to not applying Bible counsel. Realistically speaking then, do you really think you will fare better than them with an unbelieving mate?? Logic would dictate no.
Do not let your emotions blind you and take you down a road that will lead to you AND him missing out on Jehovah's blessing. There are MANY examples of sisters who came into the truth after they were married to unbelieving mates, and eventually their mates came into the Truth. But they did not recieve Jehovah's blessing by being disobedient to him, they did it BY being obedient and loyal to Jehovah FIRST, and Jehovah did the rest.
Whether the end comes tomorrow or 20 years from now, it IS coming to an end. Why live your life in a way that will not attract Jehovah's blessing?? The ONLY THING that will allow us to survive in the Great Tribulation will be our relationship and love for JEHOVAH GOD.
He sounds like a really good guy. And even if he doesn't believe in everything you do, he is still a christian! You should still be with him. Maybe further into your relationship maybe he will start to believe more. Don't force him or drive him insane about it. Just give it time. Hope I helped! :) love your friend, Rachael
Well now that you put it that way, I'm sure your fellow JWs will bend the rules just for you.
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